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Re: COMDEX Funnies ....... Variations on a Theme

To: brass-band@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Subject: Re: COMDEX Funnies ....... Variations on a *Theme*
From: "Ima Gemendo" <zinken@xxxxxxxxxxxxxx>
Date: Fri, 03 Apr 1998 01:59:33 -0700
Organization: QUALCOMM Eudora Web-Mail (http://www.eudoramail.com:80)
Priority: low
Reply-to: brass-band@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Angela, 
You *must* be single.
You've supplied 2 ph numbers, 1 fax, 1ICQ & 3 email contacts. 
---
Ima

>On a lighter note .................
>
>At a recent computer expo. (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the
>computer industry with the auto industry and stated:
>
>>"If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we
>would all be driving $25 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon">
>
>Recently, General Motors addressed this comment by released the statement:
>
>>"Yes, but would you want a car to crash twice a day?"
>
>Additionally GM stated:
>
><1.  Every time they repainted the lines on the road you would have to buy
>a new car.
>
>2.  Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason, and you
>would just: ACCEPT, RESTART and DRIVE ON.
>
>3.  Occasionally, executing a manoeuvre would cause your car to stop and
>fail and you would have to RE-INSTALL the engine.  
>
>4.  You could only have one person in the car at a time ....... unless you
>bought "Car95" or "CarNT".  But, then you would still have to buy more
>seats ....... and possibly also a "Multi-User Licence".
>
>5.  Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the Sun, was reliable, 5
>times as fast, twice as easy to drive ........ but would only run on 5% of
>roads.
>
>6.  The Macintosh car owners would get expensive Microsoft upgrades to
>their cars, which would make their cars run much slower.
>
>7.  The oil, gas and alternator warning lights would be replaced by a
>single "GENERAL CAR DEFAULT" warning light.
>
>8.  New seats would force everyone to have the same size butt.
>
>9.  The airbag system would say "Are you sure?" before going off.
>
>10. If you were involved in a crash, you would have no idea what happened!!
>
>{source: School of Pharmacy Library Newsletter: Easter 1998}
>All Rights Reserved (Not!)
>
>Yours in computerised motoring blissfulness!
>
>A.T.
>
>===================================================
>Angela Tregaskes
>P.A. to Professor Trevor G. Smart & Departmental Secretary
>Department of Pharmacology
>The School of Pharmacy
>University of London
>29-39 Brunswick Square
>London, WC1N  1AX, U.K.
>+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
>My Work Telephone Number is: 0171-753-5900
>My Fax Number is: 0171-753-5902
>My Home Telephone Number is: 0181-870-0787
>+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
>
>Bb Baritone player:
>
>"http://www.geocities.com/TheTropics/3201";
>The Crystal Palace Band (Web Page Designer)
>"http://www.geocities.com/TheTropics/3125";
>The Fulham Band (Web Page Designer)
>"http://www.cafeinternet.co.uk";
> Cafe Internet Band 1996 (Global WWW Secretary)
>& "http://www.rhbnc.ac.uk/cyberband";
> Cyberband 1997 (Global WWW Secretary)
>===================================================
>
>If you have ICQ you can message me. My ICQ#:5203728
>
>If you don't have ICQ you can page me through
>my Personal Communication Center: 
>"http://wwp.mirabilis.com/5203728"; (go there and try it!)
>
>You can send me a regular e-mail to my EmailExpress address:
>"5203728@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx"
>
>If you want to be added to my Contact List click
>"http://wwp.mirabilis.com/scripts/Search.dll?to=5203728"; Add Me
>
>Download ICQ at "http://www.icq.com/";
>
>Include your ICQ details in YOUR e-mail signature
>"http://www.icq.com/emailsig.html";
>
>++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
>++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
>
>
>--
>unsubscribe or receive the list in digest form, mail a message of 'help' to
>listserver@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
>



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